Monday, October 12, 2015

Day 1

There's always some nostalgia writing on Your Daily Fix, but try as I might, I couldn't find a place where it made sense to keep writing something. Here I am again in the same throes as I was before, over and over, just trying to put something down on paper. And I realize among the many things I stopped doing with my practice over the past couple years, I forgot that writing something down here usually helped to get some cobwebs out of my head, or at the very least, it made me feel like I had produced something.

The other week I was thinking about my old misconceptions about what liberal arts scholarship was like. My role models at Conn, I thought, disappeared for long sabbaticals where they did the bulk of their work in the field and in writing (writing being "easy," of course), and then they taught intensely when they got back stuff they picked up in the field. Intense, hermetic research, then intense teaching to give it all back. None of that is quite accurate, or rather I don't know. What it looks like for me is about a semester of that hermetic research, then it's another three years until I'm up for my next review.

So keeping up with my work has been frustrating, I guess. The teaching seems to be going all right; it's the sustained work during the teaching that seems imperfectly burdensome. But that's how that goes, I guess (again). Maybe this review is getting to me, after all. 

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In other news, I've been eating handfuls of this terrible stuff. The knockoff version, that is. One thing is clear: I'm getting as much sugar as possible per handful per price. This stuff will rot ya teeth. I do have memories of my mom eating whatever we want to call this stuff generically when I was a kid. She liked it. I think I simply inherited that taste.


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